ASSALAMUALAIKUM...

ada satu ketika dalam hidup aku, aku ialah seorang pemarah. hang pandang aku pun aku boleh jadi marah. hal hal kecik pun aku tak boleh tolerate . mesti nak marah. ketika itu aku rasa semua benda mesti perfect. every defect might leads to  your own death. 

ketika itu aku pemarah. merah berdarah macam lava gunung berapi. bersembur merosakkan sekeliling.
sehingga la satu ketika, aku terpandang sekeliling. terkerling kemusnahan dilakukan sang bara, kehancuran dek kerana panas api baran yang tidak dikawal. dipandu besar diri, rasa bangga dan meninggi diri. aku terkesima. ternganga. tapi dah terlambat. kayu dah jadi abu, hati dah jadi batu.

sekarang aku cuba, mengawal hati yang bermaharajalela, menundukkan kepala yang bermegahkan takhta, menenangkan nafsu yang gilakan kuasa. aku sedang cuba. ada masa aku tak berjaya, tapi aku jarang berputus asa. doakan aku.

semoga akalku menjadi lebih dewasa seiring dengan usiaku yang masih remaja . :) 

jika anda juga serupa, padamkan. jangan biar api itu terus menyala. jangan biar dy merosakkan segala. pekakkan telinga dari bisikan syaitan. sesungguhnya, allah sayang orang orang yang penyabar.

goodbye....

SENDING ABANG CIK OFF

ASSALAMUALAIKUM

yesterday just heartbreaking. i went to sent abang cik off to his creator, allah swt. its just sad and full of tears. there are time along the process to claim abang cik body from the hospital, take him home, went for solat jenazah, and bring him to the cemetery. the time feel like its flying. why u so fast?

the accident was so fast. in a blink of eyes, abang cik had gone. not even a good bye. there are times, i couldnt help myself and monologing. why it had to be abang cik? why he had to left? why he had to ride the motorcycle? there are to many why... but thanks to allah.. HE give me the things name iman and islam. the answer cames back to me. my heart says, everything happen was planned by allah. abang cik had promise allah before. now he is compromising with his promises. i also had those kind of promise. its just, my time not arrive yet.

YA ALLAH, TEMPATKAN ABANG CIK DIKALANGAN ORANG ORANG YANG BERIMAN. TERIMALAH SEGALA AMALANNYA DIDUNIA INI. AMPUNKANLAH DOSA DOSA ABANG CIK. JAUHI LAH DIA DARI SIKSA KUBUR DAN SIKSA API NERAKA... amin.

perasaannya macam hantar abang cik p sekolah berasrama. macam hantar abang cik p asrama. bezanya, abang cik takkan balik dua minggu sekali. abang cik takkan balik time cuti umum. abang cik takkan balik time puasa time raya. abang cik takkan balik sampai bila bila. abang cik dh pergi untuk selamanya....farewell abang cik. selamat kembali ke pangkuan pencipta kita. kami semua terkejut. semuanya terlalu pantas. tapi kami redha. kami akan cuba tabah dan kuat... tenanglah disisi allah azzawajala...

a person needs to have somethings call tabah dan berserah. when allah says kun fayakun, then theres nothing u can do. u only can accept the qada' and qadar. u just need to believe. allah is the best planner. we make plan, and allah also plan, and at the end of the day, allah plan are the best for us. just be patience and had faith in allah and you will be rewarded. allah never burden us. he will never gave us more than we could bear. u just need to accept it and take it positively :)

goodbye...